I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how Isaiah looks and feels. More importantly, how God wants it to look and feel.
The other day, I had a meeting with three wonderful people who have come alongside of me to give me some much needed advice. We were talking about roads and which one to take for Isaiah – which one best represented who Isaiah is.

One of them asked me’ Do you want to be the High Road?’ -  that is the road specially designed for those who have a faith and would ‘get us’ in an instant.

‘Or, do you want to be the Low Road’  – that is the road that keeps who we are and what we represent quiet – let’s not shout about it on this road!!

Finally he asked me ‘ Or, do you want to take the middle road and be a bridge between the two?’ Well, that one sort of fit in my spirit, but I wasn’t quite sure what to say in response – all I knew is what God had told me to do, which was to take His word out onto the streets, to be on the retail high street, but with messages that made a difference. You know, the light went into the dark places and lit it up. That sort of thing.

So, I took it to Him the next morning. I asked Him which road to take and to be and how He saw it. I went through my three options, the High Road? The Middle Road and the bridge? Or do you want me to take the Low Road? Which one Father?

And this is what He said. Jesus was and is a bridge. Be a bridge.

I love that. That is so cool – Jesus is a bridge. So, friends, we are traveling along the Middle Road. I get a feeling that this one is narrow and marked with  a lot hard choices, and little compromise, but this is what He said, so this is what we do. Because I know my God and I know He loves me and I know He is with me in the hard times and the easy times.

Amen, so be it.

dp x

I just think He does the coolest things, we just have to keep looking up. X dp

I know it’s been quite awhile since I last wrote anything here. Sorry. I have not meant to have been away for so long, but circumstances have taken over. Maybe I will write about all of them one day. I’m still trying to figure out the lessons I am meant to be learning.

But I wanted to share this with you…I was in Scotland last week, visiting my mum (country of my birth and homeland, my beloved bonnie…). I love running on the beach near my mum’s house. This photo (taken on my iphone, sorry if the quality is not great – tho I do love my iphone!!), was my last run. I shot the reflection of the clouds in the water. When I looked at the photo afterwards, I saw three faces. Can you see them too? It really touched me, whether a trick of light or what, I really felt that He was and is there, watching over me, in all circumstances and at all times.

I hope you will find it comforting too. God bless and much love dp x

This is my friend Richard Harris. He is one of my very closest friends (married to Ramona, who is my angel). Richard sent me this story of what happened to him one day, while he was out on the streets…it’s in his words, and I hope it’ll bless you and put a smile on your face and warm your heart, as it did mine. Love him very much.

A friend and I went out to pray together last week. Among the people that had approached us for prayer were a small group of Christians who were planning on telling people about Jesus on the street. I thought they were crazy to be doing something like that, but then, most would probably think my friend and I were crazy for being on the street to pray for people, so, I guess all things are relative.

Anyhow, this group of Christians had been telling us that they had not been having much success & that they were worried that they may be asked to move on by the police (which I thought was strange as we’d already been there for half an hour without any problems at all), they said that they had had a few complaints from the local residents and hoped that this week would go better for them.
We stayed and chatted to them, praying for anything that they asked us to, and then moved on a little further down the road to give them some space and find a new place to pray for passers by that asked us to.

I was surprised when probably only 20 minutes later some of the group came walking past us. Shortly after that, another two walked passed, but I only recognised one of them. I said hello and introduced myself to the young man I hadn’t seen before. After talking for a while it was clear to see that he was feeling slightly dejected and frustrated, when I asked him why, he told me that they had been moved on from where they had set up, and they were all heading home, I was about to ask him where he had travelled from, when I noticed he had a look that said, ‘I’ve come a long way to be here’ and I thought it better not to probe. Just then I felt God say to me ‘Give him your hat’. I looked up at his head, ‘He has a hat on’ I kind of responded in my head, ‘Yes’, I felt God say ‘give him yours’, I didn’t want to. I looked down at his face again and he smiled a defeated smile, I asked his name and he replied with mine, ‘we share the same name I thought’. I remembered from earlier that this must have been the young man that was doing most of the talking, he had a large fold back speaker that he was wheeling behind him, I thought it looked quite heavy. I looked up at his hat again ‘I don’t want that hat’ I said to God, trying to back out of taking away the little warmth my head was fortunate enough to be retaining at the time. It was bitterly cold and we’d been out on the road for over an hour already, ‘Don’t take anything from him, just give him your hat’, came the nudging again, ‘this is my favorite hat’ I was trying to encourage a little sympathy from God, but it didn’t work, all I heard next was ‘Isaiah 61′, and I knew that would be the last comment, now I just had to make a choice.

I remembered what I could of the verse and it started to play in my head like an old recording, “For the spirit of the sovereign lord is upon me to preach good news to the poor and freedom to the oppressed. Recovery of sight to the blind and release for all the captives. I will give them the oil of gladness instead of the spirit of despair”. I hadn’t remembered it right, but that didn’t matter, I reached up and touched my hat ‘I tell you what”, I said out loud thinking about how I would pull this off without taking anything from him, without taking his hat, wondering how cold my head would be for the rest of the evening, and how long we would have to stand there, my ears slowly loosing any feeling other than the biting cold. ‘You take this’ I said, trying to get my brain to keep up with what my hands were doing, I had removed his hat with the hand that was still free, and placed it on his friends head. The hand that was touching my hat, was now lifting it off my head, ‘and I’d like to give you this’ I said feeling a cold gush of wind. His eyes widened and the smile that had been a little forced became a beam, “Are you sure?” he said, I actually thought about it. ‘Yeah’ I said ‘it’s not a problem’. He stood in disbelief for a few minutes more, as I persisted in telling him that I really did want him to take the hat, and at no cost whatsoever. His dejectedness and frustration melted, and I was glad I’d done it. His smile was gorgeous, and I remembered again the verse, “They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor”.

They walked away and I reminded God that this was my favorite hat, ‘I know’ he said, ‘my head’s cold’ I replied, ‘Put your hood up’ He said tenderly. My hood wasn’t as warm as my hat.

Richard is in the photo above, wearing the hat that he gave away. dp x

And then, I saw an angel in the snow!

There is something so heart-achingly beautiful about the sunlight coming through trees. This is one of my favorite things.

We were delighted that Isaiah was able to support our friends in Kenya, with our One for All campaign. We sent t shirts out to all the boys at the Kenyan Children’s Project, which is run by my friends Stuart and Chloe Glassborrow from Catch the Fire Ministries. Here are some of the lads in their Isaiah 61 t shirts, making us feel humble and proud to know that we helped out in a very small way.

I’m not sure if you are anything like me. You see, I struggle with the whole ’servant heart’ thing, the whole mentality that I am here to serve. You see, I know it in my head, but my heart says something very different. It became very apparent to me over this Christmas, where we have had family to stay, friends coming and going and me? Well ‘grumpy’ sums me up pretty well. Grumpy that my time is not my own, grumpy that I have to be kind and loving when I don’t feel like it -gosh, that is SUCH a tough one, eh?

Maybe it’s because I have been asking Him to show me the attitudes of my heart that block me from knowing Him more intimately that I feel I have had this overwhelming dump of revelation!

So, I am sitting in my kitchen watching the rain come down and hearing nothing but that and the sound of my son Gabriel watching cartoons next door and I feel, hmmm, peaceful. But it’s always the way isn’t it? When there is no major strife to contend with, we can do ‘peace’. What I really really desire is to feel this peaceful in the midst of the chaos. When relationships get strained (as they do with families and what is it about Christmas that makes it so bad?!). That is when I want to remember that I am a servant and I can choose to wear love instead of my cloak of grumpiness (well, like body armour really – that sort of ‘don’t mess with me look…’). So, actually I am also sitting here feeling rather ashamed of myself. I always thought this God stuff would be easy, you know, ask, receive etc etc…but actually we need to partner with Him in bringing the change about.

I want to tell you a story about the first time I really understood the servant thing. I had just started Isaiah properly (about three years after He had asked me too!) and I was needing to get some business cards printed. You see, I was off to my first festival with the t shirts and the idea, and I was full of hope and anticipation. My graphic designer rang me one day and said ‘What title do you want on your business card?’ Now, I really struggle with titles, don’t know why exactly, just always have. I think it’s something to do with being defined by what I ‘do’ rather than who I ‘am’. Anyway, I was driving down to pick up the boys from school and Michael, my graphic guy, needed an answer asap.

So, I am in the car and I am speaking to Him about it and what I should call myself on the business card.

CEO? I said..

Him: ‘But I run the company and I am the CEO’

ME: ‘oh yeah, well how about Managing Director?”

Him: ‘Well, Jesus does that job pretty well’

Me: ‘Okay! I know (and reader, this is the one I really wanted as I love this title because to me it sounds so cool) How about Creative Director?’

boy, was I excited about this one…

Him: ‘Where do you get all of your creative ideas from?’

Then, He dropped a word gently into my heart and I knew right then that He was right. It hurt a bit, because it sounded so not of this world and I was struggling with the idea of having it say that on my business card.

I said ‘ Are you serious? Do you really really want me to write that on my business card? I mean, that will look a bit weird, won’t it?’

He very kindly told me that I didn’t need to write it on my business card, in fact I didn’t need to write any title on my business card. Just my name. Plain and simple.

But the word that He dropped into my heart that day?

SERVANT

Then He very gently told me to remember who I was and that servant was a very high calling indeed. That humbled me, totally got me on my knees.

We went to Clapham Junction yesterday, Ramona and I (Ramona is an angel dressed up like a human…she has worked with me for a year now for free because God told her too. Now that is obedience…and major patience..). We went to give away a bunch of t shirts for our One for All initiative. We wanted to step out and step into agreement with God’s plan for Isaiah. You know, put a marker down and declare that this is what we are doing for Him. Forget the part that he asked me to do this 5 years ago. He is full of patience and if I act as if I take that lightly, trust me, I don’t.

One of the things that struck me to profoundly was how many people did not want to receive. Here we are, standing in the freezing cold saying to people ‘Would you like a free t shirt, no catch’.  Most people hurried on by without even looking at us. It made me think of what it must have been like for Jesus. Now, I am not comparing myself with Him, but I though, wow, He came down to us, for us, to give us eternal life, to give us LOVE and so many of us can’t/won’t/don’t receive it. We just walk on by without stopping. That made me feel so sad. It made me understand Sacrificial Love, in a way I had not done before. He sacrificed His life for us. Me? a few t shirts – doesn’t compare now does it?

Some of the people who did take the t shirts, asked us suspiciously, ‘Why are you doing this?’ Sometimes I said because ‘God told me to’ and sometimes we explained the idea behind One for All (for every t shirt we sell, we have to give another one away). These were the folk who stepped hesitantly towards the love, but thought perhaps there would be a sting in the tail. Then we had the group who were like ‘Free t shirts? Great, yeah, give me one!’ We even had one guy say, ‘I’ll take two’ and I am afraid to admit that in my own judgemental and suspicious way I thought ‘We’ll great, he’s got his Christmas shopping done!’. Don’t worry now, I’ve dealt with my attitude, we’re cool.

We did meet some amazing people and got the opportunity to pray for a group of guys from the British Red Cross. That really humbled me. They told us that they were so encouraged and touched by how natural we were with our faith and beliefs. So, I am on my knees, really on my knees that He would use a wounded solider to bring light into others’ lives. It amazes me.

I am sure that there is a parable in this story. I’m feeling a bit tired today, so I am not able to draw it, but if you do, let me know.

So, what did it teach me? Well, it was very uncomfortable stepping out and being obedient. It was scary but I learnt that if you keep walking, you just walk through the fear. That is a big one for me. I learnt that you can’t force love on others, they need to be willing to receive it, which brought me to think, am I willing to receive it? Am I really willing to receive unconditional love? No strings attached? That’s a big one. I’m thinking about it.